Lottery Gifter Requests Lion’s Share Of Winnings From Surprised Nephew
Those who have been around the block enough times will generally advise the people they care about not to loan money to friends or family. Failing that, they should fully expect that they will never be paid back if they do.
After all, money has a way of complicating even the strongest relationships. And as one story demonstrates, that's all the more true when somebody starts becoming financially desperate. However, one man learned the hard way that his tough circumstances can't justify everything.
Falling on hard times
When Reddit user accountforaita33 reached out to one of the site's communities with a dilemma that had just ignited in his life, he explained that he had experienced some recent misfortunes. They all seemed to culminate within the previous year.
In that time, he was laid off from his job and exhausted all of his area's unemployment options. This left his money not only tight, but essentially gone. Naturally, this has put him in a deeply desperate situation.
On the verge of losing his home
Although there was much about the timing of his predicament that was inopportune, one slight silver lining was the fact that he had already taken full ownership of his house by the time it happened.
Still, it has taken what little money he could earn from odd jobs to pay the property taxes and insurance. So while he was barely able to keep his head above water, he said that most of his meals consisted of ramen and that he's essentially scraping by by the skin of his teeth.
The only gift he could afford
In the midst of all of this strife, the man noticed that his nephew's birthday was coming up. Although he could barely afford to live as it was, he said he loved his nephew enough that he couldn't bear the thought of not getting him anything.
So, he scraped together as much spare change as he could and bought some scratch-and-win lottery tickets. Although he didn't specify how many, the results made it clear that he had bought at least three.
His nephew was really lucky!
To his amazement, he learned that his nephew had actually won on two of them. Although there aren't many people who would turn down the $50 that one of them netted the young man, the other winner was much more significant.
Although the Reddit user didn't specify how much his nephew won, he was willing to reveal that it was in the middle range of five figures. To him, this constituted a seriously life-changing amount of money.
He was vague for a reason
For those wondering why the Reddit user didn't get more specific, this was actually the responsible part of what would otherwise come off as a cringeworthy response to this good news. His vagueness was intended to protect the nephew's identity.
As he explained, this is because the winners of state lotteries are a matter of public record. This is to prevent lottery organizers from awarding winnings to friends and relatives, but it can also paint a target on the backs of genuine winners.
The man's rationale for an audacious request
After he explained his financial situation and his nephew's windfall, the Reddit user went into more detail about his nephew's living situation. Namely, that there was a world of difference between their respective levels of privilege.
The user's sister and her husband are quite wealthy, which means that the nephew's college fund should see him through the entirely of his schooling. Apparently, the nephew also has access to any material thing he could desire. As the man saw it, he didn't really need the money.
A very big ask
With all of this background out of the way, the man finally revealed his dilemma. When he heard about the nephew's lucky win, he reached out to his sister with a request that would alienate her whole family.
As he told it, "I told my sister that it would be really cool if my nephew gave me at least 3/4 of the winnings." Her knee-jerk response was to confirm that he was serious about reaching out just to try and claim 75% of what came from his gift.
Indeed, he was serious
The Reddit user confirmed he was indeed serious but his audacity didn't stop there. Somewhere in the lead up to this conversation, it appeared he had convinced himself that he was doing the nephew a favor.
As he relayed to his sister, he felt he was being generous by leaving the nephew 25% of his original win with this arrangement. He saw himself as needing all of it but didn't consider himself greedy enough to ask for the total winnings.
Nobody agreed and they showed it
Although a request like this would lead some to balk at length and break down exactly what was wrong with it, the Reddit user's sister either didn't have the energy or the inclination to do so. Instead, she simply hung up on him.
Seeing as how that conversation got him nowhere, he then attempted to text the nephew directly. However, the nephew had apparently been warned by his mother beforehand, as the Reddit user discovered his number was already blocked.
Attracting some outside opinions
Considering how abruptly those lines of communication closed for him, he sought outside opinions from a neutral third party. That's what led him to an entire Reddit community intended to judge whether he was in the wrong in this situation.
As for why he felt he wasn't, he said, "Here's the thing, I NEED this money. It's a matter of me eating or not eating. He doesn't." He clearly hoped that he wasn't the only one to find his family's reaction unreasonable.
His opinion wasn't any more popular on Reddit
Although this is rarely the case on Reddit, the man discovered that his position was so unreasonable that he united the whole community against him. There didn't appear to be a single commenter who was on his side.
And while each person had their own nuanced view, the broad strokes of why he was was simple. Once someone gives a gift, they are not entitled to any part of the spoils of that gift. In this situation, the fact that he was the one who bought the winning ticket is irrelevant.
Defeating the very purpose of the gift
Indeed, the man's response to his nephew's windfall struck everyone as so entitled that they wondered what result he had intended for the gift in the first place. How small did the win have to be before he left his nephew alone?
As one commenter put it, "You gave him the tickets as a gift-- for what purpose? If there was no possibility of him winning something from the tickets, you may as well have given him scraps of paper."
The uncle's insulting implications
For this community, there was no great mystery behind why his nephew blocked him. His demanding response to news of the win struck people as his intention to give the nephew either a false gift or one with no value.
In making this point, one user roleplayed as the uncle. In their words, "Here's a gift; it's probably worthless but if by some miracle it turns out to be worth something I want it back. It's only for you if it's actually worthless."
They weren't completely heartless
Although everyone agreed that the Reddit user was out of line, there was variation to the degree that commenters judged him. To some, it was clear that the man's desperate situation was influencing his thinking.
Among those sympathetic to his situation, it would have been understandable if he had reached out to his sister's family and asked for some financial help. Even so, they felt the idea of him considering himself "generous" for not trying to take all the money was absurd enough to warrant the response it received.
He overplayed his hand
Even if the uncle could somehow talk his way into getting some of the money, it was also clear that nobody besides him was ever going to consider his proposal for the vast majority of it a reasonable request.
Regardless of his financial circumstances — even when considered on a relative basis to the nephew's privilege — there was no way to make the idea of him being entitled to three quarters of the money sound like anything but pure greed.
His nephew was blindsided
Another issue that commenters took with the Reddit user's actions was the bait-and-switch nature of his opportunism. Rather than temper the nephew's expectations that they would split the winnings when he gave the gift, he allowed him to think the gift was his and his alone.
As another user put it, "Unless the ticket came with an agreement like 'if this wins I get half,' then the ticket, and any resulting winnings, are a gift." They added that this would be true even if the nephew was Jeff Bezos.
Even the uncle's own description admits the truth
One commenter pointed out that even the original poster's final description of the situation answers his question for him, as he asked whether he was wrong for "thinking he should share the winnings for the gift I gave him."
As this person said in response, "Your answer is right here, pal. It's not a gift if you expect it to be given back to you." This person went on to explain that the uncle would have likely come further ahead if he hadn't said anything at all.
It's unclear what the nephew would have done on his own
When raising the point that the uncle's call to his sister only sealed his fate, this commenter said, "I feel for your situation, and if I was your nephew, I might have even opted to help you out."
That said, the nature of the request made it hard for even the most sympathetic person to accept. As they continued, "However, your expectation of help, 3/4 no less, and subsequently asking your sister for it is super off-putting."
The uncle shot himself in the foot
Indeed, it wasn't lost on commenters that in the uncle's rush to secure the lion's share of his nephew's winnings, he ensured that he would never see a penny of it. And in the process, he's damaged what sounded like important relationships to him.
As one user worded this point, "If he decides to give you some that's an awesome, heartwarming gesture - which you’ve totally ruined the chances of by demanding 3/4s." They also added that he spent the same amount of money regardless of the ticket's outcome.
There's only one way back and it's to ask for nothing
Regardless of how sympathetic commenters were to his situation, they hit the uncle with the cold, hard facts. The only way to repair his relationship with his nephew is to apologize to his family and to try and be happy for him.
They also saw it as a lesson that when somebody asks for financial help and they're denied, they have to accept that answer. Unless there's some legal reason why they're entitled to a certain amount of money, they'll never get it with the uncle's approach.
Some were suspicious that any of this even happened
A common comment on this man's post was that it felt like a troll. By that, people meant that it's not uncommon for people to post stories on Reddit that are intentionally written to anger as many readers as possible.
Indeed, it's always a possibility. Since nobody can confirm who's telling these stories, it's always a little hard to tell how true they are. However, these answers give the man something to think about, even if his situation is genuine. Nothing makes a position seem unreasonable more than accusations that it was written that way on purpose.
It's not like conditions on a lottery gift are unheard of
Although some commenters suggested that the uncle should have made a deal with his nephew for a percentage of the winnings if that was what he wanted, others emphasized how common this can be.
They also noted that these conditions are specific and nowhere near as excessive as demanding 75% of any winnings. As Reddit user Ardeeke said, "My dad did this to me when he bought me scratchies occasionally as a kid, never won him anything, though, as he only wanted a cut if I won more than 10K. The most I ever got was $100."
There's an even easier way to avoid this situation
Others suggested that if it was so impossible for him not to see a gifted lottery ticket as a lost win, he probably shouldn't buy lottery tickets as gifts anymore. Although it was clear that this was a last-minute decision on his part, it should be instructive for future gifts.
After all, the cost of those lottery tickets could have gone to materials to make a homemade gift for his nephew. It may not be as valuable monetarily, but it goes a much longer way to show that he cares about him.
A middle ground between these two options
However, if the uncle isn't artistically inclined and literally couldn't find another affordable option besides lottery tickets, there was still a way for the green-eyed monster to not interfere. Unfortunately for his current situation, it was also a fairly simple one.
As Reddit user Bettye_Wayne pointed out, it's not unusual for lottery tickets to have the maximum winnable amount printed on them. In their words, "So it may be a good idea to get one that has a max payout of like $500, so there's no chance of this type of thing happening."
It's a sadly common tale
For some commenters, this story perfectly exemplified why those who win the lottery or come into a sudden windfall can see it as a curse as much as a blessing. After all, this man in Jamaica didn't claim his winnings in a Darth Vader outfit just to be wacky.
As Reddit user DctrBanner put it, "Good grief, any time someone wins money that they didn't 'earn,' why do family members feel like they have rights to that money?" And this proves that close family can be just as ravenous as distant relatives in that way.
The benefit of the doubt
Although many commenters were disgusted by the uncle's demands and even the more sympathetic ones were disappointed by his actions, Reddit user Mikaiine had perhaps the most charitable interpretation of his state of mind. They still believe he acted entitled and should apologize, though.
Yet, as they said, "I would also explain you weren't trying to be selfish and went about it wrong, that it would mean a lot if he would share some of the winnings because you're really struggling right now and it would change a lot of your life for the better."
There were even better ways to reach out to his sister
In a line of discussion that was likely embarrassing for the man to hear, some Reddit users even pointed out that there were better ways that could potentially get the money he needed. As one named DefenestratorOfSouls pointed out, it likely would have gone better if he had just asked for financial support without even mentioning the ticket.
In their words, "'It's been a rough year, I would really appreciate it if you could help me out, Sis,' sounds a lot better than 'Hey, I know it was a gift, but I actually feel entitled to that money so give me most of it.'"
A likely explanation for this misstep
Although the man didn't respond to any comments, it's hard not to wonder if the uncle's ill-advised actions were inspired by an unhelpful sense of pride. Perhaps in his mind, it's less shameful to fight for money he's not actually entitled to than to show some humility and ask for help.
Indeed, that would also explain another aspect of his hardships that seemed to go unaddressed. At least, it did until some Reddit users started giving him some more advice.
He doesn't have to be limited to Ramen
Although Reddit user VROF figured it almost went without saying that the man was in the wrong; they were more interested in his nutrition. They said he should consider visiting a local food bank, as they could have fresh produce and certainly have healthier foods than Ramen.
As they continued, "Before visiting the food pantry, I suggest going to the Budget Bytes website to look for some recipes you might want to make. Then you can hopefully find the ingredients at the food pantry."
We may never know what happened after that
Unfortunately, it's not clear whether the man reconciled with his sister's family or was otherwise able to work something out. Other than his initial post, he never said anything to the Reddit community.
Was he embarrassed into silence? Did he simply refuse to accept their answers and look elsewhere for validation? Was everyone's outrage his intended result all along? That doesn't appear to be something anyone but him will ever know. Yet, if he was genuine, he certainly got his answer.
